Through My Anxious Eyes
Come, see the world Through My Anxious Eyes…
This Camera shares a very personal experience. To describe the concept in layman’s language, and from a personal
point of view, which might not always be the case or medically accurate- When someone is suffering from Anxiety,
it is more than mere psychological experience. The brain sends various signals to the body which affects several
physiological functions such as blood pressure, pulse rate, body temperature, as well as vision, whose perspective is
expressed here. Such Physiological effects can be inconvenient to carry out everyday tasks. It is not news that in a
lot of Indian Societies, conversations about Mental Health and Wellbeing are still considered as a taboo, and individuals
going through mental crisis are often not taken seriously or are not treated with respect. There is a general lack of
Mental Health Education, awareness, and how to approach a situation, in the Society.
This Camera is a bold attempt to create awareness, and to share some personal experiences
that happen/used to happen in my everyday life.
(Disclaimer: This is a personal point of view and experience, no offence or disrespect is intended.
Everyone’s respectful opinions, feedbacks and suggestions are welcome. Please approach me at nishra.ranpura@gmail.com
if there are any discrepancies in the information provided
(Source of the Medical Information: https://www.calmclinic.com/anxiety/symptoms/visual-problems).
Inspiration, Design Process, Reflections and Observations
The Covid-19 Pandemic, and recent personal losses, while trying to start new academic endeavours,
have been driving forces behind this Experiment. The experiences of managing trivial everyday tasks while
battling through something that is not easily understood or easy to express were the inspiration behind this Simulation.
I approached this experiment from both the directions- (1) through my experiences and describing the simulations based on
them, and (2) through the different visual impairments and associating my experiences with them; and eventually took a
hybrid approach to maintain fidelity of the experiences.
There are five different Visual impairments simulated here: Light Sensitivity, Blurred Vision, Visual Snow,
Tunnel Vision, and Syncope. Each filter was a challenge. It was important to show the inconsistent vision while
experiencing Light Sensitivity and Blurred Vision, because it is not a steady vision, but rather a disturbing flicker,
hence lerp() and concepts of sin wave were used. To show the intensity of discomfort, the light brightness is manipulated
through proportionately increasing average brightness using pixels() (meaning, bright pixels become brighter, and darker
pixels will stay the same or be less bright).
Tunnel Vision was the most challenging simulation. It is basically derived from the idea of
Depth of Field, however, I was not able to achieve required results by using Blur effect Radially on a
live Camera. I instead settled with darkening the peripheral vision, and blurring the pixels based on the darkness.
Part of the code for Tunnel Vision is derived from Brightness by Daniel Shiffman:
https://processing.org/examples/brightness.html
Some of the visual looks are slightly different (less realistic) from actual and physical experiences,
however, any effect as a whole quite accurately expresses my experience.